Beliefs

One of my counseling exercises is to write down what I believe. That varies from day-to-day, hour-to-hour. Wavering feelings are, apparently, typical of grieving parents. But right now I believe that:

• Colby lived and died as he was meant to
• If I ask the right questions and pay attention, Colby left many answers
• Mourning is a learning experience
• Colby is still here and he lives inside me and everyone who knew him
• Colby is still teaching me how to live
• Words that express how I feel about Colby and his passing do not exist
• Death does not end a relationship, it just changes how we communicate.
• Parents that have lost children are broken, and when they are put back together there is a part missing
• No one grieves in exactly the same way
• Death leaves a heartache no one can heal and love leaves a memory no one can steal

• In the big picture, material things do not matter
• Nothing in my life has prepared me to mourn the passing of my child
• I am more overwhelmed now than at any other time in my life
• I often feel helpless, but not hopeless
• Colby is far happier now than he ever was here on Earth