Floods

We have just gone through the worst flooding in Nashville's history. Are still going through it. Devastation everywhere. Too mind-boggling to describe, but if you are interested in learning more, the Tennessean and WSMV have photos and video. I am fortunate. My only inconvenience has been a lack of electricity and limited access to roads.

Today I drive to a few places where Colby and I used to hike. Most I cannot get to; the rest are completely underwater. I am saddened beyond belief at the destruction these flood waters have caused. Will cause. So many people have lost everything they own. I so wish Colby were here because he would jump right in to help. My son would be right out there in the middle of it all lending a hand, or a smile, or a pat on the back. I have seen many stories over the past few days of neighbor helping neighbor. Colby should have been one of them. I want to do this in his place, but I cannot. I have helped horses and other animals, have driven through raging flood waters to be sure they are fed, housed, dry. But I do not have the emotional strength to help stranded people. I wish I did. I really wish I did.

The flood has caused many to lose their lives and I am reminded that everyone is someone's son or daughter. So many new grieving parents. I am surprised by how much this affects me emotionally. I am again overwhelmed, unfocused, jittery. My stomach does continual flip-flops and I feel like I cannot breathe. I wish Colby were here. I so wish he were here. That's the only thing that will help. But that will never, ever, be.