Birthday

Today is Colby’s birthday. Today, he would have been 24. Via phone, mail, and email I receive many birthday wishes for Colby from my support group and from friends. I so wish he were here; would give anything for him to be here. But he is not. I have given much thought to the various ways I can remember his birthday and decide the best thing I can do is file incorporation papers for Colby’s Army, the nonprofit organization founded in Colby’s memory.

Soon, Colby’s Army will present a united front to educate and encourage people to affect positive change in animal welfare, the environment, and personal development. These were all things Colby felt strongly about, and in these areas he hoped to change the world. Collectively, through Colby’s Army, maybe we can accomplish that on his behalf. In coming weeks, as things progress, I’ll post more information.

In addition to getting Colby’s Army off the ground I spend a few minutes at the spot where Colby passed. I bring Abby (our dog) and she looks pleased to be here. This is her first time at this spot and she wags her tail the entire visit. I think of Colby’s past birthdays and especially one of his favorites, when he had a party at Chuck E. Cheese. He was seven or so, and had one of the best times of his life. More recently we’d eat sushi in honor of his birth and talk of good times spent together.

Now, I take a few moments to sort through more of his “stuff,” as I do every day, Within a minute I find an envelope filled with birthday cards from Colby’s grandma and from me. He had saved every one. How ironic that I would find this today, of all days, the day of his birth. The cards are all humorous, and some are worn, as if he had looked through them over the years. I sit with the cards spread out around me and sort them by years. Most are easy to figure out. I guess on a few. Then I carefully store the cards with Colby’s writings and song lyrics, knowing that I, too, will treasure them for many years to come.