Piles

I couldn't sleep last night and today I am back to shaky and emotional. I go through more of Colby's stuff. Some I sort for the Goodwill, others I mark for his friends, most I just let sit. Colby had a lot of stuff. Two rooms and most of the basement. I do a little every day and by now I see some progress. I pile musical equipment in one area, books in another. Clothes, DVDs videos, video games, all find their way into their own areas. If I can order his things, I think, my life will become more orderly. Not sure that is true, but I follow my instincts and keep sorting.

I have misplaced important papers for Colby's memorial service and can't reach people to complete important tasks. Insurance, security, park officials, crematory. Do they all take Friday off? It is frustrating and I am impatient and cranky. I want, I need, to stay on top of everything. I don't want any surprises on Wednesday, Colby's Celebration of Life. The event must go smoothly. I won't get through it if it doesn't.

A friend calls and I feel better. Calmer. I decide to get out of the house. Everything can wait an hour. A little fresh air, a little perspective, can change everything.